BULLYING
Each one of us has encountered bullying in our lives. This act can damage someone physically, mentally, and emotionally.
What is bullying? Bullying is an act of physical or verbal aggression that is repeated numerous times and involves an imbalance of power between the victim and the bully. It can be performed through: Physical, verbal, relational, and reactive.
Physical and verbal means are already understandable. The first one is done by damaging the exterior part of the victim (e.g. hitting, kicking, punching, etc.), while the other is done by hurtful words and destroying them emotionally. Relational is directed on making someone stay away from a peer group and is executed through intimidation, threats, spreading gossips and rumors, etc. Reactive is done when a former victim transforms into a bully and goes on to pick on others.
What is the cause of bullying?
There many causes of bullying. This includes: • They think that it will elevate their status.
• To fit in. They think inflicting pain unto others will make them cooler in the eyes of their peers.
• The standards of an environment (home or school) are not very high when it comes to treating others.
• To get the attention they crave. The negative actions tend to magnet a lot of attention compared to the positive ones.
• They feel it would give them a power over someone.
• Lack of empathy.
Bullies sometimes come from the household where they don’t get much love, attention, and discipline. They might have witnessed someone in their family getting aggressive towards another family member, which has a possibility that they may pick up the same behavior. The family members are the children’s first teacher. So, if they are not careful, it will lead the children to act the same. Though, it is not guaranteed that they come from a dysfunctional family.
What are the effects of bullying?
The outcome of bullying towards the bully, the victim, and the bystanders can have a serious result.
For the victims, the outcome may be experiencing negative physical, school and mental health issues. They are more likely to experience depression and anxiety, increased feeling of sadness and loneliness, changes in sleep and eating patterns, loss of activities they once enjoyed, and health problems. In school environments, they are likely to have decreasing academic achievement, participation in classroom activities, and miss, skip, or drop out of the class.
In some cases of extreme outcomes, victims might commit an act of violence when they are pushed over the edge.
For those bullies, the effects may be displaying high levels of aggressive behaviors which can make an effect in their future, the difficulty and struggle in maintaining relationships, have difficulty in comprehending limits and boundaries, abuse alcohol and other drugs in adolescence and as adults, and have criminal convictions as adults.
For those bystanders, they are more likely to have a tendency to skip or miss school, feel scared and guilty for not doing anything, experience pressure to participate in the bullying, and become anxious and worried.
There are reports that bullying is often linked with suicide. Though, not all youths who are bullied have thoughts of suicide or engage in suicidal behaviors. Still, the risk can be increased further when the victims are not supported by their parents, peers and school. This should be given serious attention and it is important to be aware and prevent this kind of incident from happening.
What to do to stop bullying? When someone is bullied, don’t stand there. Take action. Stand up for them and never leave them in that kind of state where they are at risk. Let the bullies know that it is not right to pick on someone and it is no way cool.
Talk to an adult, a parent, or a teacher you trust. They know what to do when these things happen. It is their job to keep you and everyone else safe. Do not be afraid to do so. Telling is not tattling and making up stories. It is the right thing to do.
Be kind to the victim. Make them feel that they belong. Show them your care by including them in your friends. Invite them to do something. Just a simple act of kindness and spending time with them will help them know that they are not alone. Not saying anything will only lead to worst case scenarios and make it worse for everyone. The bully will think it is okay and continues it.
If you are the one who is bullied, don’t fight back. It will only escalate the situation when you use violence. Violence is never the answer. You can try coming up with comeback lines. Once you give your line, walk away and keep walking. The bully wants your reaction, it is their goal is to take you power, intimidate you and scare you. If you show them that you are not scared, they will often lose interest.
If you are afraid, avoid the places where you would usually see the bully or where they hang out. If they can’t see you, then they can’t bully you. If these tactics don’t stop, it is the time to be asking for help. Don’t be afraid to let someone know of your distress. Make your voice be heard. Don’t make it grow overtime.
Always respect everyone. No matter what they are or who they are, respect them. We may be different in certain aspects, but we are all the same.
Let us educate young people about bullying. Tell them that it is not okay to inflict pain on others. Tell them they should reach out to the victims and create a peaceful and accepting community. Let us make them know that they are accepted and are not alone. Make sure that their voices are heard.
No matter what, you deserve to be safe. Everybody has the right to live in a safe environment both in home and school.
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