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Talk:Use of Silicon Anodes in Lithium Ion Batteries

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Revision as of 23:17, 7 December 2009 by August.J (Talk | Contributions)

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1 - Okay first of all, it would be very useful to explain in your introduction that you are trying to prove that silicon anodes are better, I didn't really know what was going on till like halfway down the page. Also remember that lots of people will read only the introduction at first and then judge if the article is worth reading. They can't know that it's worth it unless they know that you are trying to improve the batteries by using silicon. (I know that it says it in title but it will seriously make your article stronger)

2 - I am huge fan of numbers, I know that you said that the specific capacity is 4200Ah/g and that is so much bigger then carbon and I get that because i am an engineer but your average reader may not know what Ah/g is, maybe send a wiki link to show what that are or perhaps be like, your every day laptop battery could then last for like three days!!! SWEEEEEEET

3 - Your missing two sections but you obviously know that, just thought that I would mention it!!

4 - Maybe send a link to wikipedia explaining what thermal vapour deposition is.

5 - Same thing with Vapout-Liquid-Solid deposition process, didn't know what it was till I looked it up

6 - you have a reference I THINK in the last paragraph that isn't hyperlinkd properly, take a look at it you'll notice it right by "theoretical value of 4200mAh/g"

--Penlington

Make link to eff improvment more clear-- break off into section[edit]

--Joshua 13:47, 20 November 2009 (UTC)


There's no need to reference the same source several times in the same paragraph, like in "Existing Technology." One reference at the end of the paragraph will do.

This is a personal opinion but having so many subtitles for each section interrupts the flow of your page. I don't think you need the subtitles "method" "manufacture" and "advantages" at all, just separate these into paragraphs.

As I mentioned yesterday, make sure you have a section clearly explaining the energy improvements, the way that you did in your presentation.

Other than that your page is really good and I also liked your presentation, I can tell you know what you're talking about.

Danpaz 04:18, 3 December 2009 (UTC)


Copyright

I am not exactly sure what is a copyright violation on this page. I belive it is figure 3 and will be taking it down as I had no intention of violating any copyrights and would like to right this wrong. If there are any more problems I would wish to know so I can correct this.

August.J 04:17, 8 December 2009 (UTC)